On the rollercoaster front, things got a lot worse before they got a lot better. To sum it all up, 185 lbs. decided to have HER spend the night on his birthday weekend (after he had been giving me the impression for the previous 2 weeks that we were working on our relationship). I had a mini breakdown because of it. We've moved on though. We're no longer working on our relationship and I'm trying hard to move on which so far is working pretty well. It helps that the more than I find out about HER the more I've lost some of my jealousy of HER (which I'll admit was making things worse for me, my self esteem was horrible and it was made worse by thinking he'd met the perfect woman--but I found that she's definitely not the perfect woman and I'd rather she not even have any influence over my kids because we obviously have different values).
I'm looking forward pretty optimistically which has been helped by my being almost half way to goal and I can only think it can't possibly get worse than it has been the past couple months.